Light of Christmas
by ale-la-pazza1
Summary: Post DH-minus the epilogue. The war is over but things didn't turn out how Harry expected.


The war had ended for almost a year, the prophecy was fulfilled, the Chosen One defeated Voldemort but the aftermath was not quite what he has expected.

Somewhere along the lines, life lost its script and it went its own way: unpredictable, messy, real.

He had always thought that after the war he would have come back to Ginny, be happy with her, maybe start something deeper. He thought Ron and Hermione would have gotten engaged, and he thought they'd all celebrate.

But one year later, not a single of these things had come true.

Sure there were celebration for the victory, but they were tainted with the blood of all the innocents who lost their lives in the fight. The Weasleys still mourn Fred; Teddy is an orphan, and he still misses his owl.

Ron and Hermione tried to make it work, it took them six months to realize that they were going no where; they only kept pushing each other to the edges at the point where they were on each other's nerves. Still their relationship is not what it used to be.

Harry and Ginny ended even worse: last week Harry finally put the nail in the coffin of their relationship. It was not what he remembered or wanted and even less what he needed. She couldn't get him, she couldn't understand why he was the way he was. She couldn't see the invisible scars, none of them could.

Maybe only Hermione could. But it's always been like that between them, they don't need words, in some kind of cosmic way they just get each other.

He needed to get away so after his last fight with Ginny he simply disappeared on a grief tour: he went to the cafè when he and his friends were attacked, he went to Hogwarts to pay his respect to Dumbledore, and he went to the Forrest of Dean to remember how easily it felt to be around Hermione, only her.

The last stop was Godric's Hollow, he needed to see his parents' grave one more time.  
Deep down he knows he's acting like a spoiled brat, disappearing off the face of the earth without so much as a note or an owl, but he felt like falling into this dark hole and he didn't want to drag them down with him.

He is walking toward the grave he is looking for, ready to make flowers appear for his parents when he notices that a wreath of Christmas roses are already there.

He looks up to see his best friend waiting for him, she's half smiling, half tearing up, and he hurries his pace to catch up with her. When he's close enough she hugs him tightly. 

"Sorry I disappeared like that" is the first thing he says.

She doesn't really let go of him when she replies "I should axe your ass for being such a brat but now is not the time", he nods and lets the hug get through him.

After a minute she loses her grip and they both turn toward the grave, silence getting the best of them.

Harry fights the tears, after all this time the fact that his parents are dead still affects him deeply, he's eighteen years old and alone in the world.

Well maybe not completely alone judging from the person next to his arm.

She finally breaks the silence "Harry, you scared me so much. Last week I got up and you were gone. I waited the whole day and you didn't come back. Everybody told me not to worry, but I couldn't help to."

He can't look her into the eyes, they're too watery from her own tears, he removes his arm from her grip to put it around her shoulders and hold her close.

"I've searched for you for a week Harry. I went everywhere but you weren't in any of those places. Then it hit me. Today is Christmas' Eve and I knew you'd be here" she finishes her tale.  
"I didn't want to scare you Hermione, I'm sorry, but I needed to get away. I felt like I was falling into this dark, empty hole…"

"And I'd have caught you, Harry. Whenever you feel like falling, I will always be there to catch you, call you back from the darkness" she said tenderly caressing him on the cheek.

"I should know better by now, shouldn't I?" he cracks up with a half smile.

"Yes, you should. But even when you don't, I'll remember you."

Harry feels his heart beat faster, the need to brush the snow out of her hair, the scent of her perfume getting through his nostrils, he takes in the beauty of this moment.

"You'll always be there, won't you, Herm?"

"Always" she softly replies raising her wand, moving it in a circle through the air and making something appear over their heads.

It takes a few seconds for Harry to recognize it: mistletoe.

"I didn't know wizards had such mugglish traditions" he says, trying to test the waters.

"They don't. But you and I are not only wizards. This is a tradition for us, isn't it?" she asks, bravely taking a step closer.

He closes the distance and softly kisses her, she tastes like vanilla, snow, and Christmas. She tastes exactly what his body craves for.

"Merry Christmas Hermione" he tenderly says.

"Merry Christmas Harry" she replies putting her head on his chest and letting him wrap in a hug.


End file.
